Dear sleeping world,
It is now 1:30AM and I am up from a deep sleep, due to a second night loaded with traumatic nightmares which had me yelping out and launching upright in bed (a difficult maneuver given this watermelon-sized ball I carry in my front pouch). The vision that rocked my slumber? A sequence in which I got my newborn down for the very first time, and I was out of her room, and doing some chores about the house. Next I race into her room for I hear what I distinguish as my newborn’s muffled cries. Open the door as quickly as possible because a fear is rising and I just know that I have neglected the neonate, only to see a woman – a stranger – in my baby’s crib holding her and nursing her.
Needless to say bile rose; I felt disoriented – a bad mother already – and I called out to Erroll who attempted to soothe me, but my frayed nerves would not be tranquillized.
I shall make myself feel better now by putting my delusionary visions down to the heat stroke I suffered today, poolside that I was in the searing Dubai midday sun…